The Pigeon's Lament

Hey. Wazzup. I'm Pidgee-poo, but you can just call me Pidge for short. I was bred an buttered in New York, the city of cities. Ah, the city that never sleeps. I have such great memories as a little chick, fluttering and hopping under the air-conditioner in a Very Prominent Building on Wall St. and later making my nest for my own chickadees from shredded bank notes flying from the windows. Ah, those were the days. But then old Madoff, and all those other evil human-folk, lied and the whole economy collapsed! It doesn't make much sense to a pigeon. But now there was nothing left to eat, to find in the tossings of gourmet restaurants! People were eating what even birds wouldn't. In fact, some were so desperate they were trying to eat us! It was getting too dangerous around here, so after one particularly close encounter, I took off, and now here I am, in the middle of some desert mountain in Arizona, all alone. But does anyone ever consider the pigeon's plight? No, they just call us pest, rats with wings, and scoff at us. *sniff* And after all that we've been through! Well! If it wasn't for us, you'd be even worse off than you are! And how do you repay us? Kick us and steal our food, our city. We were the ones that guided Columbus, that fool, over here. And now look where my kindness has gotten me! Well I never!

NOTE: THE CONTEST WILL CONTINUE IN THE COMMENTS SECTION BELOW FOR 3 MORE DAYS, THEN A WINNER WILL BE DECIDED....